Uncooperative Crickets

How to Fix My Jumpshot

I lost my iPod Shuffle today. I have no idea how it happened. I went to the locker room to change for basketball, and I was listening to it when I walked in. Jim was there, so I turned it off and talked to him. We got dressed, and then we went up and played basketball. We came back down, and it wasn't in my locker. Jim said he saw me put it in my locker, so I don't know. Maybe it is stuck in some corner of my backpack that I couldn't reach.

It is also time for my semi-annual post about flaws in the mechanics of my jump shot. I think I fixed it today. Here are the keys:

1. Don't jump much. This keeps my body under control.
   
2. Hold the ball slightly farther to the right than I feel comfortable. This causes my forearm to be completely vertical, and allows me to be a "two-eyed shooter" (thanks to Pete Maravich for that tip).
   
3. (this is the one I was missing) Cock the hell out of your shooting wrist. This will give you enough power so that you can simply shoot with your legs and your wrist, so you don't need to use your arm.
   

Hopefully I just look this post up the next time I start playing basketball after a long break.

Here are the three funniest people alive today (unscripted category):

1. Paula Poundstone
   
2. Adam Carolla
   
3. Norm McDonald
   

Paula cleaned up in last week's Wait, Wait...Don't Tell Me. She is hilarious.

In outrage news: a Brazilian man raped his nine-year old stepdaughter and got her pregnant with twins. Her doctors decided that it isn't safe for nine-year olds to have twins, so they aborted the babies with the mother's consent. The kicker: the Catholic church excommunicated the mother and the doctors for performing an abortion (the child was spared because of her age). Do you know what punishment the man got? None. (Kind of like: What is the highest position a woman can hold in the Catholic church? "Nun.").

Mano points out that the man probably would have been in more trouble with the church if he had worn a condom while raping his step-daughter. Something seems backwards here, but maybe it is just me.

Speaking of Mano, check out The Daily Show video at the end of Mano's post here. Fast forward to the 4:15 mark for some great hypocrisy on both sides of the aisle. This is really The Daily Show at its best.

posted by Dirk Awesome @ 3:27 PM